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Welcome, dearest reader, to "Your Fullest Potential," a book that does even more than collect dust on your shelf. Picture this as a lighthouse, its bright beam cutting through the fog of uncertainty, steering you toward your grandest dreams. It's your Swiss Army knife of personal development tools, brimming with time-tested techniques, compelling habits, and some darn good advice, all aimed to help you sculpt your own success story.
We've got it all – from morning and evening routines that'll make even the owls and roosters envious, to dreamlining, which, trust me, is way more exciting than laying in bed staring at the ceiling. We'll delve into understanding personal needs (not the 'chocolate at 2 AM' kind). You’ll be setting goals that don't make you want to curl up into the fetal position, and you’ll learn to schedule your life without feeling like a lemming. Every page flipped is a step closer to the real you, the one brimming with untapped potential.
"Your Fullest Potential" isn't just about lighting a spark in you; it's about kindling that into a roaring bonfire of passion and action. Can you smell the marshmallows burning? It's not a monotonous lecture; it's a treasure trove of practical nuggets, carefully curated to carve your path to success and fulfillment. Its ultimate goal? To embolden you and those you share this with to leave the ordinary behind and embrace the extraordinary lives you've been dreaming of.
This book was born out of a desire, a drive to fast-forward your journey of personal growth. Picture me as a guinea pig, if you will. I've plunged headfirst into a sea of self-improvement literature, weeded out the fluff from the stuff, and survived to tell the tale. This book is the elixir, extracted from that vast, often contradicting ocean of wisdom. It's not just my life that has been the test lab; these principles have found resonance with my friends too, who've been aggressively pushing me to get this wisdom out to a larger audience. So, here we are, on the brink of an incredible journey to unlock "Your Fullest Potential." Buckle up! This is going to be one heck of a ride!
At seventeen, just as life was starting to sprout some flavor, I was caught in the throes of the most crucial choice any teenager faces – the daunting task of picking a college. Being born under Oklahoma skies, OU was the safe, all too familiar choice, but the Sunshine State had been my playground for three years and my twin sister was all set to become a Gator at UF.
But as fate – that saucy minx – would have it, my indecisiveness sent me into the Air Force recruiter’s office. Welcome to 2005, a year that was as pleasant for military enlistment as a porcupine at a balloon party. Yet, that rocky road I embarked on, adorned with the pebbles of Basic Training, the boulders of tech school, and the occasional unexploded ordnance in Balad, Iraq, crafted the foundation of my strength.
Basic Training served as the quintessential example of how we humans have an unyielding capacity to adapt, and quite surprisingly, thrive amidst adversity. Ever wonder what your breaking point is? Try breathing tear gas for five minutes before doing wind sprints. Trust me, you'll find out.
Next came tech school, an episode in my life that had all the charm of a root canal. Picture this: I was the one chosen to guard the dorm doors through the night. Twelve solid hours, me, a chair, and the door. Let's just say, if the door were a bit more talkative, we would have become best buddies.
Just as I was contemplating becoming a professional door-watcher, along came a mysterious officer. He waltzed by one evening, left me with a stack of books, and then evaporated into thin air. To this day, I haven’t seen him again. Mr. Mysterious Officer, if you're out there, drop me a line, would you?
One of these gems was "The Alchemist" by Paulo Coelho. The pursuit of one's 'Personal Legend' struck a chord so deep within me that I finished the book in one sitting, faster than you could say "7 Habits of Highly Effective People."
But the true game-changer was Tony Robbins’ “Awaken the Giant Within.” This wasn't just a book; it was a cataclysm of self-transformation, leaving no stone of my perception unturned. It was so profound that I devoured it not once, but twice. Yes, it was that good!
So here I was, stuck in a job that had all the excitement of watching paint dry, yet somehow, I found a goldmine of self-growth right there. Those nights, filled with words of wisdom and silent introspection, served as the launching pad toward my fullest potential.
In hindsight, I can't help but chuckle at the irony. I joined the Air Force, but it was the air force – of countless pages flipping – that truly propelled me forward. So, here's to an unexpected journey and to finding inspiration even in the monotony of guarding a door. After all, if life isn't a bit absurd, what's the point, right?
We've got it all – from morning and evening routines that'll make even the owls and roosters envious, to dreamlining, which, trust me, is way more exciting than laying in bed staring at the ceiling. We'll delve into understanding personal needs (not the 'chocolate at 2 AM' kind). You’ll be setting goals that don't make you want to curl up into the fetal position, and you’ll learn to schedule your life without feeling like a lemming. Every page flipped is a step closer to the real you, the one brimming with untapped potential.
"Your Fullest Potential" isn't just about lighting a spark in you; it's about kindling that into a roaring bonfire of passion and action. Can you smell the marshmallows burning? It's not a monotonous lecture; it's a treasure trove of practical nuggets, carefully curated to carve your path to success and fulfillment. Its ultimate goal? To embolden you and those you share this with to leave the ordinary behind and embrace the extraordinary lives you've been dreaming of.
This book was born out of a desire, a drive to fast-forward your journey of personal growth. Picture me as a guinea pig, if you will. I've plunged headfirst into a sea of self-improvement literature, weeded out the fluff from the stuff, and survived to tell the tale. This book is the elixir, extracted from that vast, often contradicting ocean of wisdom. It's not just my life that has been the test lab; these principles have found resonance with my friends too, who've been aggressively pushing me to get this wisdom out to a larger audience. So, here we are, on the brink of an incredible journey to unlock "Your Fullest Potential." Buckle up! This is going to be one heck of a ride!
At seventeen, just as life was starting to sprout some flavor, I was caught in the throes of the most crucial choice any teenager faces – the daunting task of picking a college. Being born under Oklahoma skies, OU was the safe, all too familiar choice, but the Sunshine State had been my playground for three years and my twin sister was all set to become a Gator at UF.
But as fate – that saucy minx – would have it, my indecisiveness sent me into the Air Force recruiter’s office. Welcome to 2005, a year that was as pleasant for military enlistment as a porcupine at a balloon party. Yet, that rocky road I embarked on, adorned with the pebbles of Basic Training, the boulders of tech school, and the occasional unexploded ordnance in Balad, Iraq, crafted the foundation of my strength.
Basic Training served as the quintessential example of how we humans have an unyielding capacity to adapt, and quite surprisingly, thrive amidst adversity. Ever wonder what your breaking point is? Try breathing tear gas for five minutes before doing wind sprints. Trust me, you'll find out.
Next came tech school, an episode in my life that had all the charm of a root canal. Picture this: I was the one chosen to guard the dorm doors through the night. Twelve solid hours, me, a chair, and the door. Let's just say, if the door were a bit more talkative, we would have become best buddies.
Just as I was contemplating becoming a professional door-watcher, along came a mysterious officer. He waltzed by one evening, left me with a stack of books, and then evaporated into thin air. To this day, I haven’t seen him again. Mr. Mysterious Officer, if you're out there, drop me a line, would you?
One of these gems was "The Alchemist" by Paulo Coelho. The pursuit of one's 'Personal Legend' struck a chord so deep within me that I finished the book in one sitting, faster than you could say "7 Habits of Highly Effective People."
But the true game-changer was Tony Robbins’ “Awaken the Giant Within.” This wasn't just a book; it was a cataclysm of self-transformation, leaving no stone of my perception unturned. It was so profound that I devoured it not once, but twice. Yes, it was that good!
So here I was, stuck in a job that had all the excitement of watching paint dry, yet somehow, I found a goldmine of self-growth right there. Those nights, filled with words of wisdom and silent introspection, served as the launching pad toward my fullest potential.
In hindsight, I can't help but chuckle at the irony. I joined the Air Force, but it was the air force – of countless pages flipping – that truly propelled me forward. So, here's to an unexpected journey and to finding inspiration even in the monotony of guarding a door. After all, if life isn't a bit absurd, what's the point, right?
Action Step #1: Always know where you are
This book is filled with very easy-to-complete action steps that will help you retain what you learn. Every Action Step will take you less than a minute. Active learners retain far more information than passive readers and for your first action step, rip out this page. Do it. Fold back and forth along the dotted lines and tear where it says Tear Here. Fold where it says Fold Here; it should be long and narrow and with the contract below visible. Now, fill in the blanks. Great, now you have a bookmark and you will always know where you are. You are welcome 😏
------------Tear Here------------
Chapter 1: The Power of Habit
“Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.” – Jim Ryun
Almost everyone that I worked with in the Air Force smoked cigarettes. They asked me to join them and I politely refused. When they persisted, I asked them why they still smoke, after learning how it’s one of the worst habits for good health. Their response was “My mamma ain’t never raised no quitta”. I knew responding with words would be futile so I chose to respond by maintaining eye contact while pulling a large carrot from my cargo pocket and taking a loud bite.
Our habits are the architects of our lives. They lay the groundwork, construct the walls, and raise the roof of our day-to-day reality. But here's a concrete fact - we're often only as good as our habits. Inspiration, motivation, and perspiration are all great but can only take us so far. Habits are the never-ending fuel that propels you forward when all of that runs out. So, if you find yourself standing in front of your microwave for hours doom-scrolling TikTok before reheating your now-cold chimichanga at 3 am, it might be time to rethink your life choices.
A beneficial habit is like having a secret superpower. It's a recurring action that nudges you, step by step, towards your personal and professional goals without you needing to reinvent the suspension bridge every day. Good habits are the bricks that when mortared together, create the tornado-proof foundation of your success story.
Action step: Let’s continue building the habit of actively learning. This is an even more simple one. Fill in the blank. You can do this. I believe in you. Find a pen and write your best habit here: _______________________
Go, you! Well done 🤛
If you want to run a marathon, you have to start with the habit of putting on your shoes.
Is that line above still blank? Why? Was a pen out of reach? Fine, use a crayon instead.
No crayon either? Fine, light a candle and melt the wax onto the page and use your fingernail to mark down your best habit. Don’t even think about reading ahead without writing something on that line.
Do it.
Good habits build your foundation but destructive habits are termites, silently gnawing away at the underpinnings of your potential achievements. One of the tricky things about habits, both good and bad, is their stealthy and subtle nature. They don't stride into your life, perform a flamboyant jazz hands routine and announce, "I'm a habit, and I'm here to stay!" No, they usually slip in unannounced, like a ninja in the dead of night. Before you know it, you're knee-deep in a well-worn groove of behavior that's as comforting and familiar as your grandma's green bean casserole.
To really understand and control our habits, we have to become archaeologists of our own lives, sifting through the sands of our day-to-day routines to uncover the hidden relics of our behavior. This calls for mindfulness, a touch of self-analysis, and a dash of radical honesty. It's not always a pleasant excavation process - nobody enjoys facing their less desirable habits (I'm looking at you, procrastinators of the world). But the reward is a deeper understanding of your inner workings, and the empowerment that brings.
An interesting thing about habits is that they don’t necessarily differentiate between beneficial or detrimental outcomes. Your brain isn’t inherently concerned with whether the habit is helping you ascend towards the Everest of your potential or is the proverbial millstone around your neck, dragging you to the abysmal depths of stagnation. In the primal jargon of your gray matter, habits are simply automatic routines aimed at efficiency.
This brings us to a vital concept when discussing habits - the Habit Loop. In his influential work, Charles Duhigg referred to this as the three-step process that every habit follows: the Cue, the Routine, and the Reward. The Cue is a trigger that tells your brain to go into automatic mode and lets the habit unfold. The Routine can be a physical action, a mental process, or an emotional response. The Reward is the positive feeling you get from the routine, which helps your brain figure out if this particular loop is worth remembering for the future.
Breaking down our habits into these components enables us to dissect, understand, and ultimately, manipulate them to our advantage. By identifying the Cue, we can catch the habit early, in the seedling stage before it takes root. By understanding the Routine, we can reconfigure the actions we take. By tweaking the Reward, we can rewire our brain’s feedback system, encouraging it to adopt new, better habits.
It's worth noting that the process of changing habits is not always linear. Just like with that left turn you keep missing on your drive home, there will be wrong turns and dead ends. And that's okay. The point is not to get it right every time, but to be resilient enough to get back on the road each time you veer off course. The aim is to steer our lives towards becoming architects of our habits rather than being the buildings they inhabit.
In the grand scheme of things, we are all a composite of our habits. From the way we brush our teeth to how we tackle big decisions, it’s a convergence of tiny rituals and routines that makes us who we are. To paraphrase Aristotle, we are what we repeatedly do. Success, then, is not an act, but a habit.
So let's take our habits seriously. Let's dust off our mental magnifying glasses and scrutinize the nooks and crannies of our daily lives. Let's find the habits that serve us, and let's cultivate them with the tender love and care of a gardener. The habits that don't serve us? Well, it's time to thank them for their service, hand them their pink slips, and boot them out the door.
Action step: Let’s fire a bad habit. Fill in the blanks.
What routine would you like to eliminate? ___________________________________________
What are the current rewards?____________________________________________________
What are cues that start this routine? _________________________________________
What is your plan for changing your personal meaning of those cues? ____________________
____________________________________________________________________________
Habits aren't just the auto-pilot of your personal life. They also form the invisible engine of our social interactions and public lives. The manners with which we conduct ourselves, how we treat others, our communication styles - these are all habitual patterns. Let's say, every time you meet someone new, you have a habit of giving them a warm smile and a firm handshake. This habit can be a crucial tool in your arsenal of making positive first impressions. So, remember, habits are not just solitary activities. They echo in our relationships, and through them, they reverberate in the grand hallways of our society.
Another point to consider is that habits are adaptable. Just as a river subtly shifts its course over time, our habits are not static. They evolve and transform as we journey through the different phases of our lives. Sure, some habits are stickier than bubblegum on a hot sidewalk, but they are never eternally locked in place. In our teens, we might have a daily habit of indulging in a Zebra Cake, Star Crunch, Nutty Buddy, Oatmeal Cream Pie, and Strawberry Shortcake Roll. However, as we grow older and understand the importance of health and nutrition, we can replace that with a habit of eating broccoli, carrots, avocado, dark chocolate, and spinach.
Now, here’s an interesting habit hack - the power of Keystone Habits, a term coined by Charles Duhigg. Keystone Habits are habits that trigger a cascade effect, changing other patterns along the way. They are like the queen bee of a hive, influencing and altering the entire colony. For example, if you cultivate the habit of daily exercise, it might not only improve your fitness levels but could also lead to better sleeping patterns, enhanced focus at work, or even a healthier diet. The ripple effect of these cornerstone habits often yields benefits beyond our initial expectation.
Let's also address the elephant in the room - Habit Breakers, those unpredictable life events that shatter our routines like a glass ornament. A new job, a breakup, moving to a new city, a pandemic, or any dramatic lifestyle shift can serve as habit disruptors. They can throw perfectly selected routines into chaos, making us feel like a juggler with too many balls in the air. But here's the silver lining - these periods of transition can also be habit-making gold mines. They offer us a fresh slate, a chance to break free from our old patterns and start anew. After ending a four-year engagement to a wonderful woman in 2016, this tremendous life event was the spark I needed to destroy my bad habits and replace them with great ones.
Think about the most incredible glow up story from your school. Think about her clearly. She was average at best, right? Now she’s winning beauty pageants and bodybuilding competitions. I heard she even did an Ironman last week, isn’t that nuts? When Deborah, her younger sister, died of type 2 diabetes, every negative health habit died that day as well. She said goodbye to Little Debbie forever. Her sister’s death was her Habit Breaker. These events can just as easily cause us to spiral in a negative direction so be careful. Choose good, not evil.
However, the key to unlocking the power of habits lies not in an all-or-nothing approach, but in a more nuanced understanding. While the idea of renovating all your negative habits overnight might be enticing, it's like trying to eat a 94-pound jackfruit in one sitting. Tasty, but not recommended. Instead, think in terms of 'Habit Stacking'. This concept, proposed by S.J. Scott, refers to pairing a new habit with an existing one. For instance, if you have a habit of drinking a cup of coffee every morning, stack a new habit onto it - say, reading a chapter of this book or meditating for ten minutes. This tactic allows the new habit to piggyback onto the ingrained cue and reward of the existing habit, making it easier to adopt.
Action step: Do this now. Balance a full bottle of water on top of your toothpaste so that you'll be reminded to hydrate before brushing your teeth tomorrow morning. Your cells will thank me. And this message is for all 37 trillion of them: "You are welcome".
Write “DONE” here: __________
Lastly, let's remember - habits are deeply personal. What works for some might not work for others. Your ideal habit formation strategy depends on your unique personality, lifestyle, and goals. So, as you sift through the sea of habit advice, take what resonates with you and toss the rest back into the ocean.
To sum it up, the power of habit is like an instrument in our hands. Played without skill, it can churn out an ear-abusing cacophony. But once we master it, it can produce a symphony that serenades our lives.
So, grab the conductor's baton, step onto the podium of your life, and direct your habits to play the music that truly embodies your potential. After all, the score of our lives is written not just in the grand gestures, but also in the habitual notes of our everyday routines."
Our habits are the architects of our lives. They lay the groundwork, construct the walls, and raise the roof of our day-to-day reality. But here's a concrete fact - we're often only as good as our habits. Inspiration, motivation, and perspiration are all great but can only take us so far. Habits are the never-ending fuel that propels you forward when all of that runs out. So, if you find yourself standing in front of your microwave for hours doom-scrolling TikTok before reheating your now-cold chimichanga at 3 am, it might be time to rethink your life choices.
A beneficial habit is like having a secret superpower. It's a recurring action that nudges you, step by step, towards your personal and professional goals without you needing to reinvent the suspension bridge every day. Good habits are the bricks that when mortared together, create the tornado-proof foundation of your success story.
Action step: Let’s continue building the habit of actively learning. This is an even more simple one. Fill in the blank. You can do this. I believe in you. Find a pen and write your best habit here: _______________________
Go, you! Well done 🤛
If you want to run a marathon, you have to start with the habit of putting on your shoes.
Is that line above still blank? Why? Was a pen out of reach? Fine, use a crayon instead.
No crayon either? Fine, light a candle and melt the wax onto the page and use your fingernail to mark down your best habit. Don’t even think about reading ahead without writing something on that line.
Do it.
Good habits build your foundation but destructive habits are termites, silently gnawing away at the underpinnings of your potential achievements. One of the tricky things about habits, both good and bad, is their stealthy and subtle nature. They don't stride into your life, perform a flamboyant jazz hands routine and announce, "I'm a habit, and I'm here to stay!" No, they usually slip in unannounced, like a ninja in the dead of night. Before you know it, you're knee-deep in a well-worn groove of behavior that's as comforting and familiar as your grandma's green bean casserole.
To really understand and control our habits, we have to become archaeologists of our own lives, sifting through the sands of our day-to-day routines to uncover the hidden relics of our behavior. This calls for mindfulness, a touch of self-analysis, and a dash of radical honesty. It's not always a pleasant excavation process - nobody enjoys facing their less desirable habits (I'm looking at you, procrastinators of the world). But the reward is a deeper understanding of your inner workings, and the empowerment that brings.
An interesting thing about habits is that they don’t necessarily differentiate between beneficial or detrimental outcomes. Your brain isn’t inherently concerned with whether the habit is helping you ascend towards the Everest of your potential or is the proverbial millstone around your neck, dragging you to the abysmal depths of stagnation. In the primal jargon of your gray matter, habits are simply automatic routines aimed at efficiency.
This brings us to a vital concept when discussing habits - the Habit Loop. In his influential work, Charles Duhigg referred to this as the three-step process that every habit follows: the Cue, the Routine, and the Reward. The Cue is a trigger that tells your brain to go into automatic mode and lets the habit unfold. The Routine can be a physical action, a mental process, or an emotional response. The Reward is the positive feeling you get from the routine, which helps your brain figure out if this particular loop is worth remembering for the future.
Breaking down our habits into these components enables us to dissect, understand, and ultimately, manipulate them to our advantage. By identifying the Cue, we can catch the habit early, in the seedling stage before it takes root. By understanding the Routine, we can reconfigure the actions we take. By tweaking the Reward, we can rewire our brain’s feedback system, encouraging it to adopt new, better habits.
It's worth noting that the process of changing habits is not always linear. Just like with that left turn you keep missing on your drive home, there will be wrong turns and dead ends. And that's okay. The point is not to get it right every time, but to be resilient enough to get back on the road each time you veer off course. The aim is to steer our lives towards becoming architects of our habits rather than being the buildings they inhabit.
In the grand scheme of things, we are all a composite of our habits. From the way we brush our teeth to how we tackle big decisions, it’s a convergence of tiny rituals and routines that makes us who we are. To paraphrase Aristotle, we are what we repeatedly do. Success, then, is not an act, but a habit.
So let's take our habits seriously. Let's dust off our mental magnifying glasses and scrutinize the nooks and crannies of our daily lives. Let's find the habits that serve us, and let's cultivate them with the tender love and care of a gardener. The habits that don't serve us? Well, it's time to thank them for their service, hand them their pink slips, and boot them out the door.
Action step: Let’s fire a bad habit. Fill in the blanks.
What routine would you like to eliminate? ___________________________________________
What are the current rewards?____________________________________________________
What are cues that start this routine? _________________________________________
What is your plan for changing your personal meaning of those cues? ____________________
____________________________________________________________________________
Habits aren't just the auto-pilot of your personal life. They also form the invisible engine of our social interactions and public lives. The manners with which we conduct ourselves, how we treat others, our communication styles - these are all habitual patterns. Let's say, every time you meet someone new, you have a habit of giving them a warm smile and a firm handshake. This habit can be a crucial tool in your arsenal of making positive first impressions. So, remember, habits are not just solitary activities. They echo in our relationships, and through them, they reverberate in the grand hallways of our society.
Another point to consider is that habits are adaptable. Just as a river subtly shifts its course over time, our habits are not static. They evolve and transform as we journey through the different phases of our lives. Sure, some habits are stickier than bubblegum on a hot sidewalk, but they are never eternally locked in place. In our teens, we might have a daily habit of indulging in a Zebra Cake, Star Crunch, Nutty Buddy, Oatmeal Cream Pie, and Strawberry Shortcake Roll. However, as we grow older and understand the importance of health and nutrition, we can replace that with a habit of eating broccoli, carrots, avocado, dark chocolate, and spinach.
Now, here’s an interesting habit hack - the power of Keystone Habits, a term coined by Charles Duhigg. Keystone Habits are habits that trigger a cascade effect, changing other patterns along the way. They are like the queen bee of a hive, influencing and altering the entire colony. For example, if you cultivate the habit of daily exercise, it might not only improve your fitness levels but could also lead to better sleeping patterns, enhanced focus at work, or even a healthier diet. The ripple effect of these cornerstone habits often yields benefits beyond our initial expectation.
Let's also address the elephant in the room - Habit Breakers, those unpredictable life events that shatter our routines like a glass ornament. A new job, a breakup, moving to a new city, a pandemic, or any dramatic lifestyle shift can serve as habit disruptors. They can throw perfectly selected routines into chaos, making us feel like a juggler with too many balls in the air. But here's the silver lining - these periods of transition can also be habit-making gold mines. They offer us a fresh slate, a chance to break free from our old patterns and start anew. After ending a four-year engagement to a wonderful woman in 2016, this tremendous life event was the spark I needed to destroy my bad habits and replace them with great ones.
Think about the most incredible glow up story from your school. Think about her clearly. She was average at best, right? Now she’s winning beauty pageants and bodybuilding competitions. I heard she even did an Ironman last week, isn’t that nuts? When Deborah, her younger sister, died of type 2 diabetes, every negative health habit died that day as well. She said goodbye to Little Debbie forever. Her sister’s death was her Habit Breaker. These events can just as easily cause us to spiral in a negative direction so be careful. Choose good, not evil.
However, the key to unlocking the power of habits lies not in an all-or-nothing approach, but in a more nuanced understanding. While the idea of renovating all your negative habits overnight might be enticing, it's like trying to eat a 94-pound jackfruit in one sitting. Tasty, but not recommended. Instead, think in terms of 'Habit Stacking'. This concept, proposed by S.J. Scott, refers to pairing a new habit with an existing one. For instance, if you have a habit of drinking a cup of coffee every morning, stack a new habit onto it - say, reading a chapter of this book or meditating for ten minutes. This tactic allows the new habit to piggyback onto the ingrained cue and reward of the existing habit, making it easier to adopt.
Action step: Do this now. Balance a full bottle of water on top of your toothpaste so that you'll be reminded to hydrate before brushing your teeth tomorrow morning. Your cells will thank me. And this message is for all 37 trillion of them: "You are welcome".
Write “DONE” here: __________
Lastly, let's remember - habits are deeply personal. What works for some might not work for others. Your ideal habit formation strategy depends on your unique personality, lifestyle, and goals. So, as you sift through the sea of habit advice, take what resonates with you and toss the rest back into the ocean.
To sum it up, the power of habit is like an instrument in our hands. Played without skill, it can churn out an ear-abusing cacophony. But once we master it, it can produce a symphony that serenades our lives.
So, grab the conductor's baton, step onto the podium of your life, and direct your habits to play the music that truly embodies your potential. After all, the score of our lives is written not just in the grand gestures, but also in the habitual notes of our everyday routines."
Chapter 2: Mastering Your Mornings
All habits matter but the most important are the ones that begin your day. Most of what I’ve learned about these routines comes from the great minds of James Clear, Darren Hardy, and Tim Ferriss. Their books are must-reads but finish this one first. 🙏
For the first hour of your day, don’t you dare touch your phone! Leave it charging in your kitchen, on airplane mode. If you look at your phone, even for a second, you’ll begin your day passively responding to “urgent” problems instead of actively forging the future you desire. When you devote this first hour to yourself, it allows you to show up for the world as the best version of yourself. It’ll let you more effectively help others and work harder all day. If you have a hard time breaking the habit of checking your phone first thing every day, use this -> timed lock. You can set it for 9.5 hours just before winding down to sleep. This will guarantee no distractions during your evening and morning routines.
I’ve been working with these habits for almost two decades and about six years ago, settled on the best ones that I am able to do consistently, even when traveling. Okay, here it is:
Within ten seconds of consciousness, I begin ten repetitions of push-ups or sit-ups in bed. This is just to get the blood flowing. No sweat. I then put a big goofy smile on my face while taking thirty invigorating Wim-Hof-style breaths (Like Christian Bale in American Psycho, but instead of thinking about murder, I think about how many smiles per hour I’ll spread). I finish with one continuous long breath in while making my bed. I stand in front of the mirror and with one exhale, I recite the Morning Mantra (see on the next page) while maintaining eye contact with myself. It’s a quick 2-minute process.
Next up, a 10-minute dash of physical exertion with any high-intensity exercise I fancy that morning. This could range from jump rope (if the ceiling is high enough), to an enthusiastic jumping jack session, to chasing down the raccoon that keeps getting into my trash. Then it's time to hydrate with 16 oz of water.
Then comes my calisthenics workouts and stretching, because let's be honest, the raccoon chase isn't always enough. I’ll cool off with 15 minutes in the sun while I complete the Five Minute Journal (5MJ), where I note my top 3 priorities for the day. This helps me stay focused on what truly matters and less on ensuring my socks match. A calming 10-minute morning meditation follows, helping me center myself and achieve a state of calm (which is needed after I realize my socks, indeed, do not match).
After a hearty breakfast paired with a warm MUD WTR (mushroom and cocoa) tea, it's time for a cold-finished shower. If you've never had a cold shower before, let's just say it's nature's espresso shot! Instead of screaming when that icy water covers your entire body, I say out loud as many times as I can bear: "If I can do this, there is nothing I cannot do". It's the truth. When I see someone I'd like to start a conversation with, overcoming approach anxiety is a breeze compared to that cold shower.
So that's how I start my day. This entire process takes an hour.
The following is based on the Energy Mantra by Michael Seven. I’ve added a twist at the end. Thank you, Michael, for creating and sharing this!
Morning Mantra
Everything that I need, I already have
Everything that I have is all that I need
Anything I desire, I will receive
Because my reality is created by me
I am successful, I am peaceful
I am free, I am wise
I am potential energy
and like a phoenix, I shall rise
I am healthy, I am wealthy
I am power, I am talent
I am mind, I am body
I am spirit, I am balanced
I am honest, I am creative
I am witty, I am caring
I’m decisive, I’m ambitious
I’m courageous, and always sharing
Energy for energy
What I give is always returned to me
I have no hate in my heart
I even have a love for my enemies
Energy for energy
Pure positive power
Going on a sharing spree
Of one hundred Smiles Per Hour
1-hour Morning Routine:
Do 10 reps of any exercise (0.5 minutes)
Smile, Speak Mantra, Make Bed (1.5 minutes)
Drink 16 oz of Celery Juice (0.5 minutes)
Write in Five Minute Journal (5MJ) (3 minutes)
Visualize completing top 3 daily tasks from last night’s 5MJ (0.5 minutes)
Meditation (10 minutes)
High-intensity interval training (10 minutes)
Calisthenics (10 minutes)
Breakfast and Tea (15 minutes)
Stretch (4 minutes)
Cold Shower (5 minutes)
Why did I choose these habits?
I learned about most of these through Tim Ferris who collected them from extensive interviews with his mentors. I blindly adopted these into my routines but I understand that some people need clear reasons to start doing new things. This is for those people:
For the first hour of your day, don’t you dare touch your phone! Leave it charging in your kitchen, on airplane mode. If you look at your phone, even for a second, you’ll begin your day passively responding to “urgent” problems instead of actively forging the future you desire. When you devote this first hour to yourself, it allows you to show up for the world as the best version of yourself. It’ll let you more effectively help others and work harder all day. If you have a hard time breaking the habit of checking your phone first thing every day, use this -> timed lock. You can set it for 9.5 hours just before winding down to sleep. This will guarantee no distractions during your evening and morning routines.
I’ve been working with these habits for almost two decades and about six years ago, settled on the best ones that I am able to do consistently, even when traveling. Okay, here it is:
Within ten seconds of consciousness, I begin ten repetitions of push-ups or sit-ups in bed. This is just to get the blood flowing. No sweat. I then put a big goofy smile on my face while taking thirty invigorating Wim-Hof-style breaths (Like Christian Bale in American Psycho, but instead of thinking about murder, I think about how many smiles per hour I’ll spread). I finish with one continuous long breath in while making my bed. I stand in front of the mirror and with one exhale, I recite the Morning Mantra (see on the next page) while maintaining eye contact with myself. It’s a quick 2-minute process.
Next up, a 10-minute dash of physical exertion with any high-intensity exercise I fancy that morning. This could range from jump rope (if the ceiling is high enough), to an enthusiastic jumping jack session, to chasing down the raccoon that keeps getting into my trash. Then it's time to hydrate with 16 oz of water.
Then comes my calisthenics workouts and stretching, because let's be honest, the raccoon chase isn't always enough. I’ll cool off with 15 minutes in the sun while I complete the Five Minute Journal (5MJ), where I note my top 3 priorities for the day. This helps me stay focused on what truly matters and less on ensuring my socks match. A calming 10-minute morning meditation follows, helping me center myself and achieve a state of calm (which is needed after I realize my socks, indeed, do not match).
After a hearty breakfast paired with a warm MUD WTR (mushroom and cocoa) tea, it's time for a cold-finished shower. If you've never had a cold shower before, let's just say it's nature's espresso shot! Instead of screaming when that icy water covers your entire body, I say out loud as many times as I can bear: "If I can do this, there is nothing I cannot do". It's the truth. When I see someone I'd like to start a conversation with, overcoming approach anxiety is a breeze compared to that cold shower.
So that's how I start my day. This entire process takes an hour.
The following is based on the Energy Mantra by Michael Seven. I’ve added a twist at the end. Thank you, Michael, for creating and sharing this!
Morning Mantra
Everything that I need, I already have
Everything that I have is all that I need
Anything I desire, I will receive
Because my reality is created by me
I am successful, I am peaceful
I am free, I am wise
I am potential energy
and like a phoenix, I shall rise
I am healthy, I am wealthy
I am power, I am talent
I am mind, I am body
I am spirit, I am balanced
I am honest, I am creative
I am witty, I am caring
I’m decisive, I’m ambitious
I’m courageous, and always sharing
Energy for energy
What I give is always returned to me
I have no hate in my heart
I even have a love for my enemies
Energy for energy
Pure positive power
Going on a sharing spree
Of one hundred Smiles Per Hour
1-hour Morning Routine:
Do 10 reps of any exercise (0.5 minutes)
Smile, Speak Mantra, Make Bed (1.5 minutes)
Drink 16 oz of Celery Juice (0.5 minutes)
Write in Five Minute Journal (5MJ) (3 minutes)
Visualize completing top 3 daily tasks from last night’s 5MJ (0.5 minutes)
Meditation (10 minutes)
High-intensity interval training (10 minutes)
Calisthenics (10 minutes)
Breakfast and Tea (15 minutes)
Stretch (4 minutes)
Cold Shower (5 minutes)
Why did I choose these habits?
I learned about most of these through Tim Ferris who collected them from extensive interviews with his mentors. I blindly adopted these into my routines but I understand that some people need clear reasons to start doing new things. This is for those people:
- Exercise: This helps to jumpstart your metabolism, boost your energy, and improve your mood by releasing endorphins, often called "feel-good" hormones. If you are lucky enough to wake up next to someone and you’re both in the mood, this is a great time to fully enjoy each other. Estrogen and testosterone levels are highest in the morning. Just saying 😏
- Reciting a mantra: This serves as a powerful reminder of your values, goals, and the person you want to be. It's like fuel for your self-confidence and motivation, keeping you grounded and focused throughout the day. This was the most difficult habit to adapt because it felt foolish at first. Get over that and you’ll be better for it.
- Drinking water: Water is life. Staying hydrated is crucial for digestion, nutrient absorption, and maintaining optimal brain function.
- Writing in the Five Minute Journal: This habit encourages mindfulness and gratitude. By noting your top priorities, you foster focus and clear intention for the day.
- Visualization and Meditation: Visualization helps prime your brain for the day you want to have. Regular meditation has been linked to decreased stress, improved concentration, and increased self-awareness, among other benefits.
- Balanced breakfast: Intermittent fasting can be good and there are longevity benefits as well but for the sake of the rest of us, don’t get hangry. Nourish yourself.
Chapter 3: Enriching Your Evenings
My evening routine is a soothing counterpoint to the invigorating morning. It's time for introspection, represented by my writing and tidying up. It's important to have a neat space and a clear mind, to do away with the clutter both physically and metaphorically. The Five Minute Journal reappears for a cameo, setting the stage for visualizing the completion of tomorrow's three tasks. It's like rehearsing a play in my mind before the actual performance.
Next, I stretch my imagination (and my body) by visualizing my biggest goals and dreams. It's like giving a trailer of my future to my present self, starring yours truly. And with that, we conclude the day with some gentle stretching, like a yogi bidding adieu to the setting sun.
30-minute Evening Routine:
Tidy up my living space (10 minutes)
Prepare bag and clothes for tomorrow (6 minutes)
Write in Five Minute Journal (5MJ) (2 minutes)
Visualize completing tomorrow's 3 Tasks (1 minute)
Visualize big goals and dreams (1 minute)
Stretch (10 minutes)
There you have it. A day steeped in the power of habit. Now, I don't want you to replicate my routine, rather, think of it as a framework, a testament to the power of beneficial habits. Habits that make you healthier, happier, and more productive.
However, bear in mind, the power of habit doesn’t stem from grand, life-altering changes, but from small, consistent actions. So don't rush off trying to introduce fifty new habits all at once. Instead, pick one or two and anchor them to things you're already doing daily like brushing your teeth (hopefully you're already doing that!).
Why did I choose these habits for my evening routines?
Remember, the key to reaping the full benefits of these habits is consistency. Implement them into your routine, stick with them, and over time, you'll start noticing incredibly positive changes in your life.
Action Step: Open your calendar and find a two-hour section of time you can commit to reading and completing the action steps in chapters 4 and 5. Set a new event with a reminder, and set this book aside until then. See you soon!
Next, I stretch my imagination (and my body) by visualizing my biggest goals and dreams. It's like giving a trailer of my future to my present self, starring yours truly. And with that, we conclude the day with some gentle stretching, like a yogi bidding adieu to the setting sun.
30-minute Evening Routine:
Tidy up my living space (10 minutes)
Prepare bag and clothes for tomorrow (6 minutes)
Write in Five Minute Journal (5MJ) (2 minutes)
Visualize completing tomorrow's 3 Tasks (1 minute)
Visualize big goals and dreams (1 minute)
Stretch (10 minutes)
There you have it. A day steeped in the power of habit. Now, I don't want you to replicate my routine, rather, think of it as a framework, a testament to the power of beneficial habits. Habits that make you healthier, happier, and more productive.
However, bear in mind, the power of habit doesn’t stem from grand, life-altering changes, but from small, consistent actions. So don't rush off trying to introduce fifty new habits all at once. Instead, pick one or two and anchor them to things you're already doing daily like brushing your teeth (hopefully you're already doing that!).
Why did I choose these habits for my evening routines?
- Tidying up and preparing for tomorrow: This habit aids in maintaining an organized living and working space, reducing stress and increasing productivity. Planning for tomorrow helps in managing time more effectively. Also when your partner doesn’t see your socks laying around, their love for you will improve by 10 to 12%.
- Journaling at night: Journaling helps you reflect on the day's events, focusing on positive aspects and identifying areas for improvement, ultimately helping you unwind and experience more restful sleep.
- Visualizing tasks and goals: Visualization has been linked to increased motivation, confidence, and even stress reduction. It's a powerful tool in achieving your goals. To make my visualization more.. visual, I hired people on Fiverr to make a trailer of my future goals. That's a bit extra so feel free to visualize to old way: with your mind-movies.
- Evening stretching: It aids in relaxation, reduces muscle tension, and improves flexibility. It's an excellent way to wind down before sleep.
Remember, the key to reaping the full benefits of these habits is consistency. Implement them into your routine, stick with them, and over time, you'll start noticing incredibly positive changes in your life.
Action Step: Open your calendar and find a two-hour section of time you can commit to reading and completing the action steps in chapters 4 and 5. Set a new event with a reminder, and set this book aside until then. See you soon!
Chapter 4: Abundance
"Abundance" isn’t just a nice buzzword. It’s a mindset, a worldview that can be the difference between a life well-lived and a life of distress and fear. When you truly embrace an abundance mindset, you see the world as a place of endless opportunities instead of insurmountable obstacles. This mindset is a pair of magical glasses that suddenly reveal hidden doors and pathways you never noticed before.
Imagine for a moment, a world where pecan pie is not finite. A world where the more slices you take, the larger the pie grows. Abundance is the belief that there's enough out there for everyone. There's enough joy, success, love, resources, and yes, enough pie. It’s about sharing, not hoarding, knowing there's plenty more where that came from.
Logically, it seems counterintuitive. You might be thinking, "For every winner, isn't there a loser? For every slice of pie eaten, isn't there less for everyone else? Aren't resources limited?"
These questions are valid, and you are not alone in asking them. This is a result of the scarcity mindset that many of us have been brought up with. It's deeply ingrained in our societal structures, economics, and our survival instincts.
The abundance mentality may seem unrealistic. It may seem to promote an over-optimistic, even delusional view of the world; one that ignores the harsh realities of limited resources, poverty, and social injustice. You may feel like it fosters complacency. If we believe there's enough for everyone, won't that kill the competitive spirit that drives innovation and progress? Won't it make us less driven, less ambitious, less motivated to achieve? Might this mentality lead to overconsumption and waste? If we believe in infinite resources, won't we end up squandering what we have, depleting our resources, and harming our environment?
These are valid arguments, but they stem from a fundamental misunderstanding of what the abundance mentality truly is. It’s not about ignoring the realities of our world. It doesn't deny the existence of poverty, injustice, or limited resources. Instead, it challenges us to think beyond these constraints and envision possibilities for positive change. It's about shifting our focus from what we lack to what we can create.
In the world of abundance, competition is not eradicated, but transformed. It shifts from a cut-throat race to be the 'winner' to a collaborative effort to elevate everyone. It doesn't eliminate ambition, but it redefines success. It's not about being the best among others, but being the best version of ourselves, while helping others to greatness along the way. It is not about endless consumption; it's about endless creation. It doesn't justify squandering resources but encourages us to create value and foster sustainability.
You may think that for every gain there must be a loss but this is a zero-sum game mentality that we are challenging. We're not just trading slices of the pie here, we're baking more pies, innovating new types of pies, and sharing blueprints and business plans for bakeries to be built across the globe.
Dearest reader, I must apologize. I’m writing this chapter from Poland where there is a bakery below my apartment and the smells snuck in through my open window and crept into my words. I’m sorry if I made you hungry for pie. Let’s shift away from that.
Take the internet, for example. The amount of information available doesn't decrease when someone accesses it. On the contrary, it expands as more people contribute to it. Look at love and kindness. They multiply when shared, not diminish. That's abundance. Consider human potential. Every individual possesses a unique combination of skills, talents, and passions. The more we cultivate and share these, the more value we create.
The abundance mentality is about transforming our perspective from scarcity to potential, from competition to collaboration, from consumption to creation. It's not just about having more but being more, doing more, and giving more.
It also means believing in the endless potential within yourself. It's about knowing that you have a vast reservoir of talent, creativity, and capability that is never going to run dry. Your capacity for growth is limitless. This mentality plays a crucial role in every aspect of our lives - relationships, career, health, and personal growth. In a world of abundance, competition is replaced by collaboration, envy is replaced by admiration, and fear is replaced by courage.
Think about the love of a parent. When my little sisters were born, the love for my twin sister and I wasn't diluted; instead, the love multiplied. My parents love for each other grew more intense as well. It's a snowball effect; the more you love, the more you receive love. This idea, combined with a hoodie being sold on Instagram, sparked my desire to make this love-spreading Emotional Support Human t-shirt: StefanOswald.com/ESH
When you practice abundance, it means you operate from a place of confidence, not insecurity. For me, this confidence was much needed for overcoming approach anxiety. I knew the value of being able to meet and have authentic connections with new people. I began to take new risks, try new ways to meet people, and to fail, learn, and grow. Instead of constantly worrying about losing a new connection by saying the wrong thing, I realized that if I stay true to myself I'll naturally attract the right people and repel the ones who I have no business connecting with.
Abundance is not about having everything; it's about the belief that you can create anything. It's not about possession; it's about potential. It is not a destination; it's a journey. It's not something you acquire; it's something you tune into. It's a continuous process of growth and expansion. And it begins with shifting your mindset.
Now, imagine stepping into this world. Imagine waking up every morning with a heart full of gratitude and a mind full of possibilities. Imagine looking at every challenge as an opportunity to learn, grow, and create. That's the power of an abundance mentality.
In just a minute, we will embark on a journey of imagination, where you'll explore a life with no limits. It's not just a fun exercise; it's a powerful tool for transforming your mindset. You’ll envision yourself with unlimited time, money, and connections. What would you do? Where would you go? How would you contribute to the world?
The mind is a powerful tool, and visualization is one of its most potent abilities. When you visualize your life from a place of abundance, you begin to believe in it, and when you believe in it, you start to create it.
So, prepare yourself for this meditative journey. Open your mind, relax your body, and let your imagination guide you. Step into the land of plenty, the realm of abundance, and discover what truly lies within you.
Remember that in the universe of abundance, the only limits are those you set for yourself. Click play on the video below, your journey towards abundance begins now.
Imagine for a moment, a world where pecan pie is not finite. A world where the more slices you take, the larger the pie grows. Abundance is the belief that there's enough out there for everyone. There's enough joy, success, love, resources, and yes, enough pie. It’s about sharing, not hoarding, knowing there's plenty more where that came from.
Logically, it seems counterintuitive. You might be thinking, "For every winner, isn't there a loser? For every slice of pie eaten, isn't there less for everyone else? Aren't resources limited?"
These questions are valid, and you are not alone in asking them. This is a result of the scarcity mindset that many of us have been brought up with. It's deeply ingrained in our societal structures, economics, and our survival instincts.
The abundance mentality may seem unrealistic. It may seem to promote an over-optimistic, even delusional view of the world; one that ignores the harsh realities of limited resources, poverty, and social injustice. You may feel like it fosters complacency. If we believe there's enough for everyone, won't that kill the competitive spirit that drives innovation and progress? Won't it make us less driven, less ambitious, less motivated to achieve? Might this mentality lead to overconsumption and waste? If we believe in infinite resources, won't we end up squandering what we have, depleting our resources, and harming our environment?
These are valid arguments, but they stem from a fundamental misunderstanding of what the abundance mentality truly is. It’s not about ignoring the realities of our world. It doesn't deny the existence of poverty, injustice, or limited resources. Instead, it challenges us to think beyond these constraints and envision possibilities for positive change. It's about shifting our focus from what we lack to what we can create.
In the world of abundance, competition is not eradicated, but transformed. It shifts from a cut-throat race to be the 'winner' to a collaborative effort to elevate everyone. It doesn't eliminate ambition, but it redefines success. It's not about being the best among others, but being the best version of ourselves, while helping others to greatness along the way. It is not about endless consumption; it's about endless creation. It doesn't justify squandering resources but encourages us to create value and foster sustainability.
You may think that for every gain there must be a loss but this is a zero-sum game mentality that we are challenging. We're not just trading slices of the pie here, we're baking more pies, innovating new types of pies, and sharing blueprints and business plans for bakeries to be built across the globe.
Dearest reader, I must apologize. I’m writing this chapter from Poland where there is a bakery below my apartment and the smells snuck in through my open window and crept into my words. I’m sorry if I made you hungry for pie. Let’s shift away from that.
Take the internet, for example. The amount of information available doesn't decrease when someone accesses it. On the contrary, it expands as more people contribute to it. Look at love and kindness. They multiply when shared, not diminish. That's abundance. Consider human potential. Every individual possesses a unique combination of skills, talents, and passions. The more we cultivate and share these, the more value we create.
The abundance mentality is about transforming our perspective from scarcity to potential, from competition to collaboration, from consumption to creation. It's not just about having more but being more, doing more, and giving more.
It also means believing in the endless potential within yourself. It's about knowing that you have a vast reservoir of talent, creativity, and capability that is never going to run dry. Your capacity for growth is limitless. This mentality plays a crucial role in every aspect of our lives - relationships, career, health, and personal growth. In a world of abundance, competition is replaced by collaboration, envy is replaced by admiration, and fear is replaced by courage.
Think about the love of a parent. When my little sisters were born, the love for my twin sister and I wasn't diluted; instead, the love multiplied. My parents love for each other grew more intense as well. It's a snowball effect; the more you love, the more you receive love. This idea, combined with a hoodie being sold on Instagram, sparked my desire to make this love-spreading Emotional Support Human t-shirt: StefanOswald.com/ESH
When you practice abundance, it means you operate from a place of confidence, not insecurity. For me, this confidence was much needed for overcoming approach anxiety. I knew the value of being able to meet and have authentic connections with new people. I began to take new risks, try new ways to meet people, and to fail, learn, and grow. Instead of constantly worrying about losing a new connection by saying the wrong thing, I realized that if I stay true to myself I'll naturally attract the right people and repel the ones who I have no business connecting with.
Abundance is not about having everything; it's about the belief that you can create anything. It's not about possession; it's about potential. It is not a destination; it's a journey. It's not something you acquire; it's something you tune into. It's a continuous process of growth and expansion. And it begins with shifting your mindset.
Now, imagine stepping into this world. Imagine waking up every morning with a heart full of gratitude and a mind full of possibilities. Imagine looking at every challenge as an opportunity to learn, grow, and create. That's the power of an abundance mentality.
In just a minute, we will embark on a journey of imagination, where you'll explore a life with no limits. It's not just a fun exercise; it's a powerful tool for transforming your mindset. You’ll envision yourself with unlimited time, money, and connections. What would you do? Where would you go? How would you contribute to the world?
The mind is a powerful tool, and visualization is one of its most potent abilities. When you visualize your life from a place of abundance, you begin to believe in it, and when you believe in it, you start to create it.
So, prepare yourself for this meditative journey. Open your mind, relax your body, and let your imagination guide you. Step into the land of plenty, the realm of abundance, and discover what truly lies within you.
Remember that in the universe of abundance, the only limits are those you set for yourself. Click play on the video below, your journey towards abundance begins now.
Abundance Meditation
I hope you enjoyed the journey. The answers to those questions will be instrumental in moving forward in your journey towards your fullest potential.
I sincerely hope that you keep tuning in to this abundance mentally every day. For me, I still have some days where my punk-ass scarcity mentality sneaks back and that's okay when it does. I acknowledge it, deal with it, and move forward.
I sincerely hope that you keep tuning in to this abundance mentally every day. For me, I still have some days where my punk-ass scarcity mentality sneaks back and that's okay when it does. I acknowledge it, deal with it, and move forward.